An Ecounter with... Line Dancing

Name    : Lilian Lui

Age        : 57

Where Are You From?   : Kuala Lumpur

Currently Residing In…   : Petaling Jaya, Selangor

What Do You Do For A Living?     : A tutor for primary school students

AEW      : Hello Mrs. Lui J I happen to know that you are a big fan of line-dancing and have been dancing for a long time now. When did you start doing line-dancing?    

LL            : I started in September 2002, after  I’ve opted for early retirement

AEW      : What actually got you started doing line-dancing?     

LL            : I’ve read about line dancing and I thought this would be an interesting exercise especially accompanied with music and songs. And I have been with it ever since.

AEW      : Tell me more about this line-dancing. What is it actually? Is it just people dancing in a group? In a line?   

LL            : Line dancing is dancing in a line as a big group. It includes country and western, latin (mambo, tango, cha-cha, waltz, rhumba) and funky dances. These dance steps are accompanied by evergreen songs, or even Top Of The Charts like Lady Gaga’s numbers.

AEW      : Lady Gaga, huh! You must be one hot mama! I heard also that you not just dance weekly, but you also perform and even enter line-dancing competitions as well. Have you won any line-dancing competitions?

LL            : I am glad my dance instructress has trained us to perform for functions and charities. Yes, my group has participated in dance competitions and had come out third. The exposure to competitions is good. We can gauge ourselves against other groups who are good in their music and costumes too.

AEW      : How do you feel about performing? I mean, do you enjoy performing? What about when you are performing? Are you nervous? Excited?    

LL            : I enjoy performing very much. I am normally relaxed and I enjoy the stage performances. When we get rounds of applause, I am very happy.

AEW        : What would be “next step” for you in terms of line-dancing? From what I heard, you are pretty good at it. Would you consider teaching?   

LL            : I’d rather be a student than a ‘teacher ‘in line dancing. 

AEW      : Oh... Why?      

LL            : Well, I’ve been a school teacher for more than 26 years and now I want to enjoy line dancing and not feel so ‘stressful’ teaching adults. I did sit for 2 levels of ISTD line dancing exams.  I did very well but it was only for the experience and to gauge my own achievements.  I’m happy with just that.

AEW      : Is your husband a big fan of yours too?   

LL           : Oh yes! He is very supportive. He gives me a lot of encouragement because he knows that I really like line dancing. He chauffeurs me to the venues and is also my ‘official’ photographer!

AEW    : *grin* That is nice indeed. Well, Mrs. Lui - here's to many, many more years of line dancing and winning competitions!

An Encounter with... A Mother

Name :  Sarah Lau (I'd like to leave out my married name just in case I ever have any piano  students or whatever who know me J) 

Age : Forever 21.  Just kidding, unfortunately.  I'm 33 

Where Are You From? : Malaysia

Currently Residing In…  : USA

What Do You Do For A Living? : I mostly stay home with my kids but in the last year and a half, I started teaching piano from home

AEW :  Thanks for doing this. I know you were just a new “mom” all over again and probably extremely busy doing Mom-type-stuff with your troop. So, how many in the troop now?

SL :         Four

AEW:   I’m actually curious – you know, how it’s hard in life to say that favoritism does not exist? But it must surely exist even if just a minute level, yes? How do you balance your time, love and affection between all your children?

SL :      To be bluntly honest, I found that if anything, I've always favored the youngest - until the next baby came along, that is! Although I don't really like using the word "favored", since it's more of a feeling that the youngest child's needs seem more pressing and important at almost any given time.  Also, the youngest always seems cuter than the others J but I think that's normal.

AEW:   I’m pretty sure your children are all very individual by characteristics. How does each one inspire you differently?
SL :      My oldest son is very easy-going and stinkin' funny.  He inspires me to let go and let life happen.

My younger son (by 2 minutes *laughs*) is very detail-oriented and makes comprehensive plans about things.  He inspires me to know when to be organized and have passion about the things I choose to do.

My older daughter is literally the sweetest, most affectionate person I've ever met in my entire life.  Everyone says this about her.  She inspires me and everyone around her, for that matter, to be joyful and loving in all circumstances.

My younger daughter, who is only 7 weeks-old is just awe-inspiring with her amazing cuteness.  When I look at her I'm inspired to smooch her all over and smell her baby head, and just be a better Mom all the way around.  She also inspires me to have more babies, even though before her I was very certain I was done!  I'm still kinda certain... but when I cuddle my baby I just don't want the babyhood stage to end!

AEW:   Awww… How sweet! At the other end of the spectrum, how does each one annoy you differently?

SL :      Oldest son always has to have the last word.

Younger son wants to have things so planned-out that it drives me crazy sometimes, the questions he asks me in order to accomplish all he wants.

Older daughter is sooooo affectionate that sometimes I just need a break, because I'm the complete opposite and I am not touchy-feely at all.  She needs a huge amount of my time and sometimes with the baby it does get exhausting emotionally.

Baby sometimes annoys me when I'm dead tired in the middle of the night and she won't sleep!  *smiles*

AEW:  Kids, huh. I don’t have kids of my own but I’m not the “mother-material” and nothing’s ticking at the moment J So, do describe – how does a ‘tough day’ typically look like for you?

SL :      Can I be really honest, and make other parents hate me by saying that my kids are really, really, easy?  They are extremely well-behaved and mind me very well.  So if I ever have a tough day, it typically revolves around not getting enough sleep the night before because the baby kept me up, and then crashing until lunch time, then having to drag myself up to fix meals for the older kids, although they help with the meals and clean up after themselves and then feeling guilty that my older kids watched too much TV that day because I was tired/busy with the baby, and then my husband calls and is going to be home late and I'm just ready for some adult interaction! 

And the other thing is a tough day also usually involves teaching piano.  I teach 3 days out of the week and although I like and enjoy teaching, I'd rather spend time with my own kids.  I put so much mental and emotional energy into teaching that by the time my students - especially the little ones - leave, I'm just drained and done, and I have a difficult time meeting my own kids’ emotional needs after that.  I dread having to keep the house clean for students and I dread worrying about whether the baby will stay asleep while I'm teaching, and wish I could just have a day with ONLY my kids and do whatever we want.  Teaching is not a long term thing for me. I started doing it out of a need and while I'll always keep a tiny handful of students around – just  the ones I truly enjoy and who are gifted – I do not want to be a full-time piano teacher my whole life.

AEW:   Hey – you know what? Your tough day doesn’t sound all that tough now that you’ve put it that way. But I can definitely imagine the energy-draining part of teaching! Away from ‘tough days and all’, what about the ‘high notes’ for you where your children are concerned?

SL :      I love days when my husband isn't working, of course.  I also look forward to my non-teaching days because then the kids and I can all just chill-out and enjoy each other more.  I can let the house go if I want, and I can sleep in if I want, and we can go anywhere we want to! 

AEW :  Wow – that sounds super-awesome J I’m quite sure every mother strives to be the best and impart knowledge and information to their children. What is the single most important knowledge you would wish to impart to your children, aside from religion?

SL :       I have always worked very hard to teach them how to live healthy lives all the way around.  They are smarter about health creation than any other children I know as a result, and whether or not they stick to the lifestyle and diet things we do when they get older, will be their choice - but I will at least know that I have done my best to show them how to have great health.

AEW :  Nice one J How would you want your children to remember you ‘when the time comes’?

SL :     I would like them to remember that although I was not a perfect mother, I always did my best.  I want them to remember the times I try to sit and spend time with them, whether collectively or individually, and the fun times I try to create for their enjoyment.  I'd also like them to remember me as a smart and strong person who did what I felt was best for myself and my family, regardless of what the norm is.  I want them to remember that their Mother wasn't afraid to go against the flow.

AEW : Well, Sarah, thanks for your time again. Whilst I have no wish to be a mother myself, I think motherhood must be one of the toughest job in the world. All the best to you and hope you will have a treasure trove of "high notes" watching all your children grow up *smile*

** Photo of Sarah and Family by Sarah Anne Photography

An Encounter with...Chocolate

Name : Leigh Ann Seto

Age :  46

Where Are You From?   Honolulu, Hawaii, USA – Land of dancing trees, double rainbows and Hawaii Five-O!

Currently Residing In… : Phnom Penh, Kingdom of Cambodia

What Do You Do For A Living?  I whip cream, play with chocolate, and paint with edible glitter.  All part of my day as a pastry chef.  Oh, I do bake too.

AEW : What is Chocolate to you?

LAS :  Chocolate is what makes people happy. I personally don’t eat a lot of chocolate myself.  But I love working with it. It’s an ingredient, it’s a canvas, it’s paint and it can be a lifesaver. It’s amazing all the things that can be made with chocolate - whether it is for consuming or viewing.

AEW : Tell me, or rather, share with me your thoughts on why chocolate is such a big fuss the world over.

LAS : The ancient Aztecs and Mayans believed it to be an elixir. So the Spanish carried that with them back to Europe. As time progressed, chocolate became a symbol of romance and love. Through the years though, chocolate has become more refined and the quality has come up a great deal. Now that the medical field has found that chocolate can be good for your health too, more people are happy that some delicious temptations can actually be good for them.

AEW : Tell me about the temptation bit. I really have to try hard to fight a chocolate binge! Hmm... Have you learnt any lessons from Chocolate itself? Maybe it was inspirational? Maybe it was cultural? Anything?

LAS :  When I first started working with chocolate, I found that it could be VERY temperamental. I’ve had a few 'bad chocolate' days. Like when I’ve rushed the chocolate and it didn’t come out nice. I soon realized that the chocolate is ready when it wants to be ready. And when it is ready, you better drop everything for it or you start all over again. 

AEW : Chocolate is your ‘thing’ as a Pastry Chef, yes? Why?  

LAS : It’s a good medium to work with. Many things can be made with it. There are also so many savory dishes that can be made with chocolate. Chocolate is also available with different percentages of cocoa, which reaches out to more consumers, different consumers.

AEW : And what’s YOUR special chocolate ‘thing’ to make as a Pastry Chef?

LAS : Everyone enjoys a good chocolate mousse. I make several styles of mousse. My personal favorite is a smooth cream style. It’s like eating a brulee that melts right as it hits your tongue. 

AEW : You know, Chef, eversince I've met you, I've been putting on some "fatty weight". Your chocolate desserts are simply superb! But what about Vanilla? Are you also a Vanilla person? 

LAS :  I love vanilla. I prefer vanilla ice cream to chocolate ice cream. Vanilla is a very subtle ingredient. It’s actually almost in everything, though it may go unnoticed. I even keep a vanilla pod in my sugar canister just for a hint of the aroma.

AEW : Well, I don't mind Vanilla every now and then too. But Chocolate dominates for sure! What is actually good quality chocolate and what is bad quality chocolate? No, no, don’t tell me about the raw stuff. I’m talking about the types of chocolates that mortals like me can readily eat J

LAS : Good quality chocolate is made with cocoa butter and not vegetable fats. The higher the cocoa, the better. But most chocolate bars in the market are made with vegetable fats. 

AEW : Would you care to share an easy home-cooking recipe using Chocolate for the readers? Errr, hopefully, a low-fat one J

LAS : Sure, but I don't do low fat! For low fat, melt some 65% chocolate and have a fruit fondue instead!

AEW : I should've asked you all about Low-Fat vs Full-Fat as a pastry chef! But perhaps, I shall keep that for next time! Thank you so much for your time, Chef! I'm going to go get me a slice of Devil's Food Cake now!

For those who would like to have Chef's Chocolate Cream Mousse recipe - click HERE!

An Encounter with... A Pink Wedding

Name    : Nicole Liemphetcharat

Age        : 36

Where Are You From?  : Singapore

Currently Residing In… : Phnom Penh, Cambodia

What Do You Do For A Living?   : A bunch of different things but primarily, I run my own consultancy firm and provide global support for an international moving company. I also help develop businesses for our pastry business in Cambodia.

AEW      : When did you meet your other half?

NL        : In 1998 but the attraction really only happened in 2002.

AEW      : Who “courted” whom?  

NL        : There was no real courtship as we were already good friends for almost 4 years. We were spending a lot of time together and out of the blue, this door opened and we walked right in.

AEW      : Legal rights of marriage is still being debated in many parts of the world, especially Asia – what made it important to the two of you to get married?  

NL        : We wanted to get married a few months into the relationship as we were a great fit together. However, we’re both very rational and decided that the smart thing would be to live together and wait a few years. Three years later, she proposed and I said yes. We wanted to take the relationship further and it felt absolutely right.
We were living in Singapore at that time and got married in Toronto, Canada. I had spent six years living there before so it was like a second home. Getting married was never about spousal benefits or any legal implications as we were still living in Asia. Getting married was about us celebrating the absolute certainty of sharing our lives together in the presence of our family and friends.

AEW      : Is there any particular significance to a gay marriage? I’m comparing this to a normal one.  

NL        : No. Marriage, straight or gay, is about two people committing themselves to each other. It’s about promise of strength and support to ride the roller coaster of life together as a couple. It makes no difference whether you’re straight or gay!
Gay marriages are susceptible to the same joys and problems of straight marriages. Financial issues, children, family, infidelity, career, compromises and everything that comes with being married affect both groups the same way. 

AEW      : I’ve watched ‘The L Word’. Not sure if you have. But do you think commercial Hollywood has warped the general public’s (re : non-gay community) view on this whole gay thing or has it actually made it easier for people to “come out”?

NL        : In my opinion, “The L Word” does not give an accurate portrayal of gay women. There are probably women who live that lifestyle but what we see on the show seems closer to male gay culture than the general lesbian culture.
Hollywood in general has helped raise awareness, tolerance and acceptance of gay people, making it a little easier for gay people to come out. Gay people are now portrayed as the girl or guy next door with real lives, careers and responsibilities. Through Hollywood, gay people are no longer merely seen as sexual deviants.
However, the reality is that sex sells and so gay-centered and/or gay-friendly shows such-as “The L Word” will continue to “expose” the gay sex life, however accurate or inaccurate it may be. This could negatively affect how the general public view gay people and bring us back to being sexual deviants.
The effects of depicting straight people sleeping around on shows are different from watching gay people sleeping around. Sure, most of society frowns on watching this sort of free sexual behavior amongst straight people but when seen in gay people, it’s easy to fall back on the old notion of social and sexual deviance.

AEW      : I’m actually very interested to know about family support from both your side as well as your other half’s. Were they supportive or did they threaten to disown you guys?

NL        : Coming out was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I’ve been gay since I was a teenager but only got comfortable with it when I was in my early twenties. I just never thought I’d come out to my family as my parents are fairly conservative. My brother has known for years and has always been supportive.
I decided to come out to my parents after we decided to get married. Getting married is one of the most important steps in my life and my parents have always been there for me so I wanted them to share this moment.
After breaking the news, my Mom’s heart was broken and there were lots of tears and questions as to how this could happen to me. The next 5 months were very difficult for my Mom and I. Eventually, she came around, accepted it and attended our Singapore reception. My brother broke the news to me and it was one of the happiest days of my life!
My Dad’s reaction caught me a little off guard. Growing up, my Dad was always the more liberal parent so I thought he’d accept it. When the time came, my Dad was clearly upset but maintained his composure and was rational as always. He just said that he was not thrilled at the idea but he’s not going to try to stop me as it’ll get us nowhere. So, I will do what I choose to do and we are to keep him out of it. Additionally, he asked that I not announce the news to my uncles and aunties.
It was about six months afterwards before Leigh Ann and I went to my parents’ house together again but when she finally did visit, both my parents were civil and polite to her. Now, years later,  everything’s pretty much back to normal and we stay at my parents’ house when we are back in Singapore. Mom’s visited us everywhere we’ve lived and vacations with us whenever possible.

Leigh Ann’s family is a lot more liberal….they’re Americans! Her Dad attended our wedding in Toronto. When I first met her family in Hawaii during her mother’s funeral about 4 years ago, they all welcomed me with open arms and instantly treated me like family. When we moved to Hawaii in 2007, we lived upstairs from her brother and his family. Her family made living in Hawaii very memorable for me.  

AEW      : Had you not been given the blessings from your family – would you have carried on with the wedding?  

NL        : Absolutely! When we decided to get married, I knew my parents would not be jumping for joy but it was something I wanted to do, something I was absolutely certain of. At that time, I wished my parents would be supportive but I also understood how difficult it was for them. It would have been great to have them both at the wedding but I was going to take that step with or without their support. The marriage is between the two of us so the only reason not to get married would be if we didn’t feel like it would work out between us.

AEW      : Do you actually have some sort of hope for the future of ‘pink weddings’ for other gay  couples?

NL        : No, not really. I am grateful that the Gay Movement has given us the right to get married legally. However, marriage is marriage, straight or gay. Marriage is not for everyone so it should only be undertaken with absolute certainty. Do I hope to see gay marriages legalized in Asia? Certainly. But I won't hold my breath!

AEW     : Thank you, Nicole! That was very insightful indeed! Here's to happy marriages - straight or gay :)

An Encounter with... Diabetic Treats

Name    : Ivie ong

Age        : 33

Where Are You From?  : Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Currently Residing In… : Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

What Do You Do For A Living? : Can I say “Live-in maid where I get my main income from and a  baker for side income”? J

AEW      : Why did you come up with the idea to research and experiment with making diabetic treats?

IV        : I enjoy baking since I was young.  I find baking therapeutic and satisfying when the end products turn out well. Of course, it sucks when I fail and have to finish the baked goods all by myself or throw it away.  Anyway, I started baking from home ever since I quit my office-bound, politic-abundant I.T. job (I am a lousy shoe-polisher). My main ‘supporters’ at that time were mainly family members, especially during festive seasons. Long story short, the idea of making diabetic treats just struck me one day after a few personal encounters with people I know.

My late grandmother was a diabetic for years. She loved her treats, especially nyonya kuih. As guilty as we knew, we continued to buy her treats. There wasn’t much of an avenue to go to for diabetic-friendly treats.

My mother-in-law is a diabetic. Her blood sugar level may not be super high but she is very strict with her food intake, especially on sweet treats. Ever since we discovered natural sugar replacer, I started baking for her on and off. I once baked some cookies for her afternoon snack. She loved them a lot and she had to ration herself to only 1 or 2 cookies a day so that the container of cookies could last longer! 

As we laughed about it, it just hit me subconsciously that it was so sad. I have a soft spot for desserts and I can’t imagine myself having to only look at desserts and not be able to eat it. How many restaurants and cafes I go to actually serve something that are diabetic-friendly? Not even a handful. In fact, I haven’t seen any myself! And that was how I decided to embark on this journey… A little niche market but I am enjoying the journey of experimenting and modifying recipes to provide a little indulgence to these people.

AEW      : What got me interested about you and what you have to offer is the fact that my Dad is diabetic. But he has a sweet tooth. Any advice?  

IV        : First of all, I am not a dietician or nutritionist, thus, I can’t give any advice from a professional point of view. Neither am I qualified to come up with diet plans. However, I do learn a lot from reading and the internet has been a wonderful source of knowledge for me. It’s about change of lifestyle to start with. Instead of refraining himself from eating sweet treats, he should slowly change his diet, slowly cut down on his sugar and carbohydrate intake. He has to take food that doesn’t suddenly raise his blood sugar level sky high. Try to go for food with as low Glycemic index (GI) as possible. Replace ‘white stuff’ such as white rice and white bread with ‘brown stuff’. Take Basmati rice instead of white rice. Take wholegrain such as barley, whole grain bread; consume legumes, fresh vegetables and fruits with low GI. Pasta in general has lower GI compared to rice and cook pasta to al dente texture (not over-cooked).

There has been a vast selection of sugar replacer in the market – artificial (i.e. aspartame such as Equal, acesulfame potassium) and natural (i.e. maltitol, isomalt, xylitol). These sugar replacers have been approved by FDA. They lower one’s calorie intake and do not raise one’s blood sugar level as high as normal sugar and carbohydrate do. However, one should still use them with controlled proportion. That boils down to portion and balance. So, if your dad still can’t take his drinks ‘kosong’ (without sugar), add a little bit of sugar replacer and he can continue to enjoy his drink. How can a Chinese "Tong Sui' have no sweetness in it? Again, he can use a little sugar replacer.Being a diabetic doesn’t mean your dad has to strictly stay off his favourite desserts forever. If all fails and there isn’t any other substitutes for his beloved desserts, he can always allow himself a tiny little piece of that sweet-little-thing while reducing the portion of other food such as bread or noodle. Last but not least, you and I know very well that we can’t ignore exercise in our life.

AEW      : I usually buy him some of those off-the-shelves cookies, jams, chocolate that are suitable for diabetic patients. How does those stuff compare to what you make?    

IV        : Freshness with lots of TLC. Hahahaha… I bake the products as close to delivery date as possible. Sugar is not the only thing diabetics have to avoid. Carbohydrates, fats and salt should also be consumed in controlled portion, something that shall be applied to everyone. Through experiments and tastings, thanks to some ‘guinea pig’ friends of mine and their honest comments, I try to produce something with less fat, salt and higher fiber content. At times, I do substitute and replace certain ingredients with something healthier such as yoghurt and oats.

AEW       : Of course, these commercialized diabetic treats cost a bloody bomb! Why are they so expensive? Is it only this part of the world that it is expensive or it is more or less a global thing?

IV        : Why? That was exactly the same question I asked my supplier. The answer I received was, there are technologies and loads of R&D done on sugar replacers. Thus, it is expensive. I am not exactly sure of the price in other parts of the world but from what I know, sugar replacer is much cheaper in countries with stronger currency, dollar to dollar. Unfortunately, with currency conversion it becomes a ‘bomb’ here.

Besides, as I mentioned earlier on, I modify and replace ingredients and certain ingredients are unfortunately not the cheapest in the market, especially when I can’t get them in bulk all the time.

AEW      : So that means a lot of poor people who are diabetic can't quite afford to satisfy their sweet-tooth?  

IV        : Yeah. That was one of the few things in my mind when I first started this. I wanted products that were not overly-priced. Unfortunately, I can’t price it too low due to the ingredients used in the products. I try to find a reasonable price model and something that is value for money. I do feel it’s a matter of perspective and personal choice. A simple local snack from the roadside stall or cafe will cost you an average of RM0.80 each. With that amount, or slightly more, you could get yourself diabetic-friendly treats. Of course, it’s still different but what I am trying to say is, it is not extremely expensive to spend slightly more on something more friendly to your body. Besides, just because these products are diabetic-friendly, it doesn’t mean you can gulp down everything at once. Which is why I emphasize on the little indulgence one can get.

AEW      : Tell me, which is your best item so far? As in, your favourite that you have researched experimented, made and finally perfected. Is this also your best-selling item?   

IV        : Personally, I love my modified version of the Lemon Sour Cream cake. I have not promoted a lot of cakes. So, I will say that my Orange Almond Cookies and Biscotti are my two best selling items.

AEW      : Do you think you will soon grow into a full-fledged Café?    

IV        : Hahahaha…. The idea of opening a café was my objective when I quit my job but that was related to gourmet coffee rather than just a café. Anyway, the idea has now been put on the back-burner and I decided to bake from home instead. So, the café idea is not in the pipeline for now but I will go as far as my diabetic treats can take me. I am always open to ideas and suggestions.

AEW      : Hmmmm…. Do you take orders? J How much advanced notice required?

IV        : Of course! For non-festive season, at least 2 days in advanced. For festive season, 1 week in advanced would be good. Do contact me beforehand, just in case I am out of town! 

AEW     : Thank you so much for your time! I would need to get my Dad some of that little treats of yours and will certainly be placing an order during the CNY! 

** Do visit Ivie's Facebook Page to see what she has to offer!