An Encounter with...Chocolate

Name : Leigh Ann Seto

Age :  46

Where Are You From?   Honolulu, Hawaii, USA – Land of dancing trees, double rainbows and Hawaii Five-O!

Currently Residing In… : Phnom Penh, Kingdom of Cambodia

What Do You Do For A Living?  I whip cream, play with chocolate, and paint with edible glitter.  All part of my day as a pastry chef.  Oh, I do bake too.

AEW : What is Chocolate to you?

LAS :  Chocolate is what makes people happy. I personally don’t eat a lot of chocolate myself.  But I love working with it. It’s an ingredient, it’s a canvas, it’s paint and it can be a lifesaver. It’s amazing all the things that can be made with chocolate - whether it is for consuming or viewing.

AEW : Tell me, or rather, share with me your thoughts on why chocolate is such a big fuss the world over.

LAS : The ancient Aztecs and Mayans believed it to be an elixir. So the Spanish carried that with them back to Europe. As time progressed, chocolate became a symbol of romance and love. Through the years though, chocolate has become more refined and the quality has come up a great deal. Now that the medical field has found that chocolate can be good for your health too, more people are happy that some delicious temptations can actually be good for them.

AEW : Tell me about the temptation bit. I really have to try hard to fight a chocolate binge! Hmm... Have you learnt any lessons from Chocolate itself? Maybe it was inspirational? Maybe it was cultural? Anything?

LAS :  When I first started working with chocolate, I found that it could be VERY temperamental. I’ve had a few 'bad chocolate' days. Like when I’ve rushed the chocolate and it didn’t come out nice. I soon realized that the chocolate is ready when it wants to be ready. And when it is ready, you better drop everything for it or you start all over again. 

AEW : Chocolate is your ‘thing’ as a Pastry Chef, yes? Why?  

LAS : It’s a good medium to work with. Many things can be made with it. There are also so many savory dishes that can be made with chocolate. Chocolate is also available with different percentages of cocoa, which reaches out to more consumers, different consumers.

AEW : And what’s YOUR special chocolate ‘thing’ to make as a Pastry Chef?

LAS : Everyone enjoys a good chocolate mousse. I make several styles of mousse. My personal favorite is a smooth cream style. It’s like eating a brulee that melts right as it hits your tongue. 

AEW : You know, Chef, eversince I've met you, I've been putting on some "fatty weight". Your chocolate desserts are simply superb! But what about Vanilla? Are you also a Vanilla person? 

LAS :  I love vanilla. I prefer vanilla ice cream to chocolate ice cream. Vanilla is a very subtle ingredient. It’s actually almost in everything, though it may go unnoticed. I even keep a vanilla pod in my sugar canister just for a hint of the aroma.

AEW : Well, I don't mind Vanilla every now and then too. But Chocolate dominates for sure! What is actually good quality chocolate and what is bad quality chocolate? No, no, don’t tell me about the raw stuff. I’m talking about the types of chocolates that mortals like me can readily eat J

LAS : Good quality chocolate is made with cocoa butter and not vegetable fats. The higher the cocoa, the better. But most chocolate bars in the market are made with vegetable fats. 

AEW : Would you care to share an easy home-cooking recipe using Chocolate for the readers? Errr, hopefully, a low-fat one J

LAS : Sure, but I don't do low fat! For low fat, melt some 65% chocolate and have a fruit fondue instead!

AEW : I should've asked you all about Low-Fat vs Full-Fat as a pastry chef! But perhaps, I shall keep that for next time! Thank you so much for your time, Chef! I'm going to go get me a slice of Devil's Food Cake now!

For those who would like to have Chef's Chocolate Cream Mousse recipe - click HERE!

An Encounter with... Love

Name    : Richard See

Age        : 34

Where Are You From?  :  Malaysia

Currently Residing In… : Cambodia

What Do You Do For A Living?   : Advertising & Communications

AEW    : What do you think is the greatest love of all? And I'm not talking about Whitney Houston.

RS        :  The love that will endure the pains & struggles but also one that has all the fun & happiness that can be cherished by 2 people. Of course over a very long period of time.

AEW      : It was said that you caught your wife off-guard when you wrote extremely beautiful wedding vows and she said, and I quote “where did you learn how to use those words?” So, tell me – what were your inspiration to write your 2-page-long wedding vows? Were they off Google in actual fact?   

RS        :  I started from zero. Did some research online, and started putting all the bullet points (of what I want to say) together first. Next was the draft.  And then it was the 'craft'. Had to make it good cos she’s going to be tattooing them onto her. I got a mate to double-check on the grammar as well!In the end it turned out to be a little too long! I didn’t know that it was so long! Maybe I just wanted her to know that I was dead serious J.

AEW      : Do you think Love has many stages? Or it is just ONE GREAT BIG MYSTERY?  

RS        :  Not sure you can break it down to stages. Courtship, going steady & marriage, perhaps? But yes, some people say that love is complicated. I guess I agree to that statement because it is hard to break it down into smaller details! I do like that it is "One Great Big Mystery" J. I prefer this. I think love puts 2 people into a journey of a lifetime and the mystery will come from discovering each other and watching the other half change, age, etc and you adapt to each other along the way to slowly and surely become entwined as ONE.

AEW      : Do you think it is possible for you to fall in love again and again and again… you get my drift.

RS       : Hmmm….yes, you can. Maybe not as often but you can. Personally, I don't think I am a very romantic person but I do believe that you can fall in love with someone again and again. It can be just a small gesture but sometimes it reminds you that you are loved by someone or simply in love.

AEW      : Is it difficult – to achieve that? That falling in love part? Especially if it is with the same person over and over again?  

RS        :  Once you’re with someone, I think you are with them for a reason, to love, be loved, to share and hope the other half will be as loving, caring and just be there for you without questions. It is love that keeps you together, so am not sure if you mean loving someone continually is the same as falling in love again and again. For me falling in love is just the beginning and loving someone is a life-long commitment. You don't give up on it.

AEW      : So Love is actually hard work? Does not come naturally or are you being confused?

RS       :  *Sticks out his tongue* I'm not confused! Love is work, sometimes hard, sometimes easy.. but normally nothing comes easy especially if it involves emotions. I think everyone needs to have level of love to function properly, some more than others, and people need to give and receive love. To maintain a relationship, you’ll need to put in effort and invest physically, mentally and emotionally into it. But the return on investment is a fascinating journey of discovery! You get what I mean?

AEW      : My God! Very deep! Throughout your life thus far, how pivotal has Love been in it and what great strengths or inspiration have you gathered from it to do what you do in life?

RS        : It has helped me grow as a person, helped provide me with knowledge and mental strength. Loving someone has given me assurance in myself and enable me to experience closeness and intimacy with another person. So it has been important to me. I think it has shaped me to become a stronger man after falling from love and getting up and believing in love again. It has taught me not to be scared to do something if you really want and truly believe in it.

AEW      : *smiles* Between To Love and To Starve – which do you think will prevail? Why do you think that?

RS        : I’ve heard and read that people go for hunger strike, so I guess that some people do starve for something that they love and believe in. To me – if I starved for Love, I must be sure that it can bring something good to the person I love! If I need to starve for 10 days to make sure that my loved one survives a tragedy – I will do it. If you ask me to choose, I would say I will starve for love J. Will that do?

AEW    : Yes, yes, That will do. Here's wishing you many, many years of love and no starvation :)

** Richard See is undoubtedly, one of the most perfect man, friend, husband a girl could ask for. That is my own personal opinion.

An Encounter with... Genetically Modified Mosquito

Name    : G. Vinod

Age        : 29

Where Are You From?  : Malaysia          

Currently Residing In… : Kuala Lumpur

What Do You Do For A Living?   : Journalist

AEW      : I read your article about GMM in Free Malaysia Today. What made you write that article?

GV        : I was concerned about the fact that the government was planning to release GMM while the world was still arguing about the safety of genetically modified plants and food products. At that point, that was the first time I heard about GMM and was concerned whether a proper public consult was done before even suggesting its release.

AEW      : Let me get something straight – are you more for proving a point on the government’s ‘mis-handling’ of this project or are you actually really concerned about the consequences of GMM?  

GV        : I would say both. An example of the first point was there were genuine concerns that not much information was provided to the public on the release of GMMs. Plus, no one knew the National Biosafety Board was already conducting closed-door experiments of GMM in 2007 itself. Therefore I can consider that the project itself is relatively shrouded in secrecy. As for the second point, there are concerns that GMM’s progeny may live if there is a presence of tetracycline in the environment where the eggs are laid. Tetracycline, being a common antibiotic used in veterinary medicine, animal husbandry and agriculture, is quite prevalent in the environment and we may risk having a GMM’s progeny running loose in our environment!  

AEW      : You did a lot of mosquito research for your article. Was it tedious or just trawling through the net?

GV        : I t was tedious in a sense that I actually had to learn about mosquitoes and what were pros and cons of releasing GMMs. However, quite a number of experts in the field had given me valuable input that had helped me to write the article 

AEW       : Did you also do your homework with Oxitec and NBB?. Was it difficult to get the information you needed?  

GV        : To be honest, I know very little about Oxitec and the NBB. I am still seeking information on them.

AEW      : So, do you think like all things “government-planned”, this was another shoddy and shady job?   

GV        : I believe the proposal is being pushed through by the government for reasons best known to them. Though I appreciate their good intentions in trying to reduce dengue cases in the country, we cannot simply put in a measure affecting public health without deliberating thoroughly. Besides, if we end up having a new breed of mosquito in the environment after the release, how do they plan to get rid of it? What if the new strain transmits a new disease? How do you go about addressing it?  These questions remain unanswered!

AEW      : It is indeed pretty scary to note that the GMMs could actually mutate and thus become HIV carriers. That being the case – do you think the human race would be wiped out or am I watching too many Hollywood B-grades?    

GV       : Even if an HIV-carrying mosquito fails to wipe out the human race, the amount of environmental damages we are doing to the planet and a nuclear war would do the trick.

AEW      : Oh. True that. What had you hoped for your article to achieve, actually?

GV        : I wanted to educate the public on negative aspects of the GMM release as the mainstream media are already highlighting the positive side of it. Let the public digest the facts and make their own decision about the release. In addition, if there are some hidden agenda behind the release, I wanted those in power to realise that there are people scrutinizing them and they cannot simply make decisions without fearing a public uproar.

AEW      : Very brave indeed. Do you think it is achievable and how do you intend to make it achievable?   

GV        : I believe it is achievable and I intend to write about it as often as I can to make it achievable.

AEW    : Well, Vinod - I hope you do make it achievable and let us know whenever your articles are published. We'll help spread the word.  

** Read G.Vinod's article about Genetically Modified Mosquitoes here!

An Encounter with... Christianity

Name    : Alex Foo

Age        : 34

Where Are You From?  : KL

Currently Residing In… :  KL

What Do You Do For A Living?   : I work in the the oil & gas industry

AEW      : You are a Christian. What are your first thoughts when I say that to you?   

AF        : Yup I am a Christian!

AEW      : Do you think you are a religiously “rich”? (You may interpret this any way you wish) And how important is religion to you?

AF        : Not rich… Christianity is not so much of a religion as I view it as a relationship with a good friend.

AEW      : What is the basic foundation of Christianty in which you would hope for the world to know?  

AF        : The Lord is our savior

AEW       : How has your religion inspired you in your life?   

AF        : Uncountable times - especially whenever I feel 'lost'.

AEW      : I often get the feeling that there are some who keep trying to “convert” others to follow the “words of God”. Do you think that might be rather insensitive or to a certain extend, disrespectful in any ways at all?    

AF        : Well, being too pushy is not good. But spreading the word and sharing testimonies are good. Don’t think Christians should force others to be Christians though.

AEW      : I do certainly understand that there is a need to spread the knowledge of Christianity around. But shouldn’t it be enough that people know about it or it should get to a point of converting?

AF        : Yes, there should be more sharing of the word and wonders of the Lord. It's not about getting the point or not. It's about sharing the love of the Lord with others so that they can experience it for themselves.

AEW      : Do you try your best to spread the “words of God” to others?

AF        : I do what I can.

AEW      : While spreading the correct views on Christianity, what are your thoughts about other
  religions?    

AF        : Depending on which religion. While other religions all have their good points, they do not offer promised salvation. So for those who knowingly reject it, all I can do is feel sad for them.

AEW     : Don't feel sad for me. I'm good :) Thanks for your time and your sharing. Appreciate  that!

An Encounter with... A Pink Wedding

Name    : Nicole Liemphetcharat

Age        : 36

Where Are You From?  : Singapore

Currently Residing In… : Phnom Penh, Cambodia

What Do You Do For A Living?   : A bunch of different things but primarily, I run my own consultancy firm and provide global support for an international moving company. I also help develop businesses for our pastry business in Cambodia.

AEW      : When did you meet your other half?

NL        : In 1998 but the attraction really only happened in 2002.

AEW      : Who “courted” whom?  

NL        : There was no real courtship as we were already good friends for almost 4 years. We were spending a lot of time together and out of the blue, this door opened and we walked right in.

AEW      : Legal rights of marriage is still being debated in many parts of the world, especially Asia – what made it important to the two of you to get married?  

NL        : We wanted to get married a few months into the relationship as we were a great fit together. However, we’re both very rational and decided that the smart thing would be to live together and wait a few years. Three years later, she proposed and I said yes. We wanted to take the relationship further and it felt absolutely right.
We were living in Singapore at that time and got married in Toronto, Canada. I had spent six years living there before so it was like a second home. Getting married was never about spousal benefits or any legal implications as we were still living in Asia. Getting married was about us celebrating the absolute certainty of sharing our lives together in the presence of our family and friends.

AEW      : Is there any particular significance to a gay marriage? I’m comparing this to a normal one.  

NL        : No. Marriage, straight or gay, is about two people committing themselves to each other. It’s about promise of strength and support to ride the roller coaster of life together as a couple. It makes no difference whether you’re straight or gay!
Gay marriages are susceptible to the same joys and problems of straight marriages. Financial issues, children, family, infidelity, career, compromises and everything that comes with being married affect both groups the same way. 

AEW      : I’ve watched ‘The L Word’. Not sure if you have. But do you think commercial Hollywood has warped the general public’s (re : non-gay community) view on this whole gay thing or has it actually made it easier for people to “come out”?

NL        : In my opinion, “The L Word” does not give an accurate portrayal of gay women. There are probably women who live that lifestyle but what we see on the show seems closer to male gay culture than the general lesbian culture.
Hollywood in general has helped raise awareness, tolerance and acceptance of gay people, making it a little easier for gay people to come out. Gay people are now portrayed as the girl or guy next door with real lives, careers and responsibilities. Through Hollywood, gay people are no longer merely seen as sexual deviants.
However, the reality is that sex sells and so gay-centered and/or gay-friendly shows such-as “The L Word” will continue to “expose” the gay sex life, however accurate or inaccurate it may be. This could negatively affect how the general public view gay people and bring us back to being sexual deviants.
The effects of depicting straight people sleeping around on shows are different from watching gay people sleeping around. Sure, most of society frowns on watching this sort of free sexual behavior amongst straight people but when seen in gay people, it’s easy to fall back on the old notion of social and sexual deviance.

AEW      : I’m actually very interested to know about family support from both your side as well as your other half’s. Were they supportive or did they threaten to disown you guys?

NL        : Coming out was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I’ve been gay since I was a teenager but only got comfortable with it when I was in my early twenties. I just never thought I’d come out to my family as my parents are fairly conservative. My brother has known for years and has always been supportive.
I decided to come out to my parents after we decided to get married. Getting married is one of the most important steps in my life and my parents have always been there for me so I wanted them to share this moment.
After breaking the news, my Mom’s heart was broken and there were lots of tears and questions as to how this could happen to me. The next 5 months were very difficult for my Mom and I. Eventually, she came around, accepted it and attended our Singapore reception. My brother broke the news to me and it was one of the happiest days of my life!
My Dad’s reaction caught me a little off guard. Growing up, my Dad was always the more liberal parent so I thought he’d accept it. When the time came, my Dad was clearly upset but maintained his composure and was rational as always. He just said that he was not thrilled at the idea but he’s not going to try to stop me as it’ll get us nowhere. So, I will do what I choose to do and we are to keep him out of it. Additionally, he asked that I not announce the news to my uncles and aunties.
It was about six months afterwards before Leigh Ann and I went to my parents’ house together again but when she finally did visit, both my parents were civil and polite to her. Now, years later,  everything’s pretty much back to normal and we stay at my parents’ house when we are back in Singapore. Mom’s visited us everywhere we’ve lived and vacations with us whenever possible.

Leigh Ann’s family is a lot more liberal….they’re Americans! Her Dad attended our wedding in Toronto. When I first met her family in Hawaii during her mother’s funeral about 4 years ago, they all welcomed me with open arms and instantly treated me like family. When we moved to Hawaii in 2007, we lived upstairs from her brother and his family. Her family made living in Hawaii very memorable for me.  

AEW      : Had you not been given the blessings from your family – would you have carried on with the wedding?  

NL        : Absolutely! When we decided to get married, I knew my parents would not be jumping for joy but it was something I wanted to do, something I was absolutely certain of. At that time, I wished my parents would be supportive but I also understood how difficult it was for them. It would have been great to have them both at the wedding but I was going to take that step with or without their support. The marriage is between the two of us so the only reason not to get married would be if we didn’t feel like it would work out between us.

AEW      : Do you actually have some sort of hope for the future of ‘pink weddings’ for other gay  couples?

NL        : No, not really. I am grateful that the Gay Movement has given us the right to get married legally. However, marriage is marriage, straight or gay. Marriage is not for everyone so it should only be undertaken with absolute certainty. Do I hope to see gay marriages legalized in Asia? Certainly. But I won't hold my breath!

AEW     : Thank you, Nicole! That was very insightful indeed! Here's to happy marriages - straight or gay :)

An Encounter with... Diabetic Treats

Name    : Ivie ong

Age        : 33

Where Are You From?  : Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Currently Residing In… : Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

What Do You Do For A Living? : Can I say “Live-in maid where I get my main income from and a  baker for side income”? J

AEW      : Why did you come up with the idea to research and experiment with making diabetic treats?

IV        : I enjoy baking since I was young.  I find baking therapeutic and satisfying when the end products turn out well. Of course, it sucks when I fail and have to finish the baked goods all by myself or throw it away.  Anyway, I started baking from home ever since I quit my office-bound, politic-abundant I.T. job (I am a lousy shoe-polisher). My main ‘supporters’ at that time were mainly family members, especially during festive seasons. Long story short, the idea of making diabetic treats just struck me one day after a few personal encounters with people I know.

My late grandmother was a diabetic for years. She loved her treats, especially nyonya kuih. As guilty as we knew, we continued to buy her treats. There wasn’t much of an avenue to go to for diabetic-friendly treats.

My mother-in-law is a diabetic. Her blood sugar level may not be super high but she is very strict with her food intake, especially on sweet treats. Ever since we discovered natural sugar replacer, I started baking for her on and off. I once baked some cookies for her afternoon snack. She loved them a lot and she had to ration herself to only 1 or 2 cookies a day so that the container of cookies could last longer! 

As we laughed about it, it just hit me subconsciously that it was so sad. I have a soft spot for desserts and I can’t imagine myself having to only look at desserts and not be able to eat it. How many restaurants and cafes I go to actually serve something that are diabetic-friendly? Not even a handful. In fact, I haven’t seen any myself! And that was how I decided to embark on this journey… A little niche market but I am enjoying the journey of experimenting and modifying recipes to provide a little indulgence to these people.

AEW      : What got me interested about you and what you have to offer is the fact that my Dad is diabetic. But he has a sweet tooth. Any advice?  

IV        : First of all, I am not a dietician or nutritionist, thus, I can’t give any advice from a professional point of view. Neither am I qualified to come up with diet plans. However, I do learn a lot from reading and the internet has been a wonderful source of knowledge for me. It’s about change of lifestyle to start with. Instead of refraining himself from eating sweet treats, he should slowly change his diet, slowly cut down on his sugar and carbohydrate intake. He has to take food that doesn’t suddenly raise his blood sugar level sky high. Try to go for food with as low Glycemic index (GI) as possible. Replace ‘white stuff’ such as white rice and white bread with ‘brown stuff’. Take Basmati rice instead of white rice. Take wholegrain such as barley, whole grain bread; consume legumes, fresh vegetables and fruits with low GI. Pasta in general has lower GI compared to rice and cook pasta to al dente texture (not over-cooked).

There has been a vast selection of sugar replacer in the market – artificial (i.e. aspartame such as Equal, acesulfame potassium) and natural (i.e. maltitol, isomalt, xylitol). These sugar replacers have been approved by FDA. They lower one’s calorie intake and do not raise one’s blood sugar level as high as normal sugar and carbohydrate do. However, one should still use them with controlled proportion. That boils down to portion and balance. So, if your dad still can’t take his drinks ‘kosong’ (without sugar), add a little bit of sugar replacer and he can continue to enjoy his drink. How can a Chinese "Tong Sui' have no sweetness in it? Again, he can use a little sugar replacer.Being a diabetic doesn’t mean your dad has to strictly stay off his favourite desserts forever. If all fails and there isn’t any other substitutes for his beloved desserts, he can always allow himself a tiny little piece of that sweet-little-thing while reducing the portion of other food such as bread or noodle. Last but not least, you and I know very well that we can’t ignore exercise in our life.

AEW      : I usually buy him some of those off-the-shelves cookies, jams, chocolate that are suitable for diabetic patients. How does those stuff compare to what you make?    

IV        : Freshness with lots of TLC. Hahahaha… I bake the products as close to delivery date as possible. Sugar is not the only thing diabetics have to avoid. Carbohydrates, fats and salt should also be consumed in controlled portion, something that shall be applied to everyone. Through experiments and tastings, thanks to some ‘guinea pig’ friends of mine and their honest comments, I try to produce something with less fat, salt and higher fiber content. At times, I do substitute and replace certain ingredients with something healthier such as yoghurt and oats.

AEW       : Of course, these commercialized diabetic treats cost a bloody bomb! Why are they so expensive? Is it only this part of the world that it is expensive or it is more or less a global thing?

IV        : Why? That was exactly the same question I asked my supplier. The answer I received was, there are technologies and loads of R&D done on sugar replacers. Thus, it is expensive. I am not exactly sure of the price in other parts of the world but from what I know, sugar replacer is much cheaper in countries with stronger currency, dollar to dollar. Unfortunately, with currency conversion it becomes a ‘bomb’ here.

Besides, as I mentioned earlier on, I modify and replace ingredients and certain ingredients are unfortunately not the cheapest in the market, especially when I can’t get them in bulk all the time.

AEW      : So that means a lot of poor people who are diabetic can't quite afford to satisfy their sweet-tooth?  

IV        : Yeah. That was one of the few things in my mind when I first started this. I wanted products that were not overly-priced. Unfortunately, I can’t price it too low due to the ingredients used in the products. I try to find a reasonable price model and something that is value for money. I do feel it’s a matter of perspective and personal choice. A simple local snack from the roadside stall or cafe will cost you an average of RM0.80 each. With that amount, or slightly more, you could get yourself diabetic-friendly treats. Of course, it’s still different but what I am trying to say is, it is not extremely expensive to spend slightly more on something more friendly to your body. Besides, just because these products are diabetic-friendly, it doesn’t mean you can gulp down everything at once. Which is why I emphasize on the little indulgence one can get.

AEW      : Tell me, which is your best item so far? As in, your favourite that you have researched experimented, made and finally perfected. Is this also your best-selling item?   

IV        : Personally, I love my modified version of the Lemon Sour Cream cake. I have not promoted a lot of cakes. So, I will say that my Orange Almond Cookies and Biscotti are my two best selling items.

AEW      : Do you think you will soon grow into a full-fledged Café?    

IV        : Hahahaha…. The idea of opening a café was my objective when I quit my job but that was related to gourmet coffee rather than just a café. Anyway, the idea has now been put on the back-burner and I decided to bake from home instead. So, the café idea is not in the pipeline for now but I will go as far as my diabetic treats can take me. I am always open to ideas and suggestions.

AEW      : Hmmmm…. Do you take orders? J How much advanced notice required?

IV        : Of course! For non-festive season, at least 2 days in advanced. For festive season, 1 week in advanced would be good. Do contact me beforehand, just in case I am out of town! 

AEW     : Thank you so much for your time! I would need to get my Dad some of that little treats of yours and will certainly be placing an order during the CNY! 

** Do visit Ivie's Facebook Page to see what she has to offer!  

An Encounter With... Gay Pride

Name    : Romyr L.

Age        :  30

Where Are You From?  :  Philippines

Currently Residing In… :  Phnom Penh

What Do You Do For A Living? : Event Management

AEW      : Thanks for being willing to be featured on my blog and for doing this interview. How long have you been “out-of-the-closet” now?   

ROM      :  After secondary school. About 15 years now…

AEW      : Are you proud of doing so?

ROM      :  Absolutely! I can’t imagine where I would be now if I didn’t come out a few years back.

AEW      : A lot of people go through different processes to discover that they are gay. What was yours?  

ROM      :  It was a self-discovery journey for me. It started when I was love-struck by a high schoolmate. At that time, I kept it only to myself. 

AEW      : Do you have any particularly frustrating incident relevant to you coming out of the closet to share with the readers?

ROM       :  None actually. Although it was at first rather disappointing for my family - especially to my father when I came out, he and the family finally accepted me whole-heartedly.

AEW       : What did you learn from it? Looking back, do you think you could’ve reacted / responded / gone about it in another way?

ROM       :  I learnt the essence of self-acceptance. You should believe and accept yourself first before others can. The moment I made a choice, there was no turning back. It was also about taking the courage to choose a lifestyle that holds mystery for you. You wouldn’t know how far you can go with it. But till now, I have no regrets and I know I won't. 

AEW      : Do you think gays are special? Ok, or rather, do you think gays should be treated as special?

ROM      :  No. Gays are not special. We are normal people. If you treat celebrities like special people that's because you are a fan. But if you are a friend, you then treat each other as equals. 

AEW      : I understand you are single, yes? Do you one day, foresee yourself in a grand pink wedding?

ROM      :  5 years ago, the thought never crossed my mind. I even thought I would live a short and lonely life! But as you meet people and experience other people’s companionship, you change your mind. Now, yes I do! And I will get married 5 years from now *giggle* 

AEW      : If that day comes, who will more likely be “bride-like” / “groom-like” (meaning, behave like a bride / groom) and of course – who will be planning your wedding J?

ROM      :  Me! I will be bride-like! And YOU! You will be planning my wedding!!

An Encounter With.... A Fellow Triathlete

Name : ​Denis Oakley  

Age ​:37

Where Are You From? ​: England

Currently Residing In… ​: Malaysia

What Do You Do For A Living? : I'm currently building Beyond Transition.com - a website providing the best race information in the world to Triathletes

AEW ​: Hey – thanks for doing this. I’m a triathlete myself and it’d be nice getting yet another  POV about triathlons. So what got you started with doing the Tri? 

DO ​: I fell in love and realized that if I was serious about wanting to spend my life with Senay I ought to make my life last as long as possible. Triathlon is a sport which you can do right into your 80's, or older, and so I took it up as it would provide long term health, which meant I'd spend more years with Senay

AEW​: Awww.... How romantic! When was your last race? And how did you fare?

DO​ : Powerman Malaysia. I DNF'd. The bike fell on me as I was putting it into the car in the rain. Then I drove under a canopy and crunched the bike. Then it fell off the roof of the car as I was driving to the start; then I drove the wrong way down a dual carriageway, lost my timing chip, was on the toilet with food poisoning as the start gun went and gave up as I needed to vomit half-way through the bike leg. Never had quite so much go wry in one morning before - but it was probably for the best as I was mentally burnt out from training!

AEW​: Oh my God! That is beyond Murphy's Law! Hey, I understand you have a job to pay the Tri bills :) And a kid too. How do you find the time to train?

DO ​: I work for myself and so fit working hours around wife and family and training. That said, I try really hard to do my training in the morning as there are always lots of reasons why it doesn't happen if I leave it till later in the day. I also have a treadMill and turbo on my balcony so I can do exercise and still be part of the family community.

AEW ​ : Do you have any training tips for other budding triathletes out there?

DO ​: Spend more time training than talking about it. Spend money on your bod, not your bike. You are the engine that makes YOU go fast - not the new bike, or the cool shoes or..... you get my drift.

AEW ​: I get some of my training tips from magazines. Do you think those are helpful?

DO ​: Have a plan, be consistent and follow it for 12 months. Then you see what works for you. Tweaking the whole time makes it hard to spot what works for you.

AEW ​: Actually, I do stick to a plan. That's because I'm so stuck with my routine that I just hate changing it. Well, apparently, it is working! I do hope to do an Ironman someday SOOON. But every time I finish a Tri – and that is only the Olympic distance ones – I feel pretty daunted – 3 hours seems grueling enough. I’m not sure 17 hours would kill me or not! Any advice?

DO ​: The scariest bit is signing up. I was scared shitless the first triathlon I signed up for, and then it took me a long time to press the submit button on Ironman Langkawi in 2008. Once you've done that you're committed.... Then it comes down to a job that you have to do. So break it up in to blocks, put the required effort into your training sessions, and see how you feel when you cross the finish line.

AEW​: Tell me more about your Tri website which you started. What’s the website aiming to do?

DO ​: Beyond Transition is all about races. It's going to be something special for everyone who does triathlons. I got frustrated at not knowing about races and then struggling to find information about the race. What we're doing is talking to race organisers and getting the best information available about the race. Some of this is the same as you get on the race website, but we're intending to add loads more than this - we're still finalising the details with some people so i can't say too much more right now.

            Basically you should feel like you've had a chat with someone who has done the race a dozen times when you look at one of our race pages. To start with we're getting a few hundred of the world's top triathlons onto the site - but over the next year or so we expect that we'll end up covering about 3000 races.

            We're working on some other cool stuff as well - which we hope is going to be ready by the time the website launches in January. Meanwhile, we have our facebook page up already and Emma Bishop our race correspondent is covering some of the best triathlons around the world. She was in Hawaii for the World Championships and is off to Phuket in Thailand for the Asia 70.3 Championships and then forwards to the Laguna Phuket Triathlon next weekend.

AEW ​: I want HER job! Lastly – if you were to shout something to all triathletes out there right now – what would it be?

DO ​: if you don't love every minute of your training and racing, take a break. It's easy to overdo it and burnout. Make sure you recover properly

AEW : And Denis - Good Luck to you too! Thank you very much for sharing with me today. Much appreciated!

To the rest of you triathletes - whether amateur or veteran - do check-out Beyond Transition for your triathlon needs!